Free asshat with every admissionWhat is it about colleges in Massachusetts that cause so much stupidity to be produced? Randal Robinson links to this column in The Globe and Mail by Paul Lewis, a professor at Boston College. It seems that professor Lewis is really angry at our president (I thought only conservatives get to be angry white men) and wants to become Canadian. Same old story, right? But wait, there's more! Lewis suggests that all the states that voted for Gore in 2000 secede from the United States and form provinces to join Canada: A map of the state-by-state voting in 2000 suggests the obvious answer. With the anomalous and proud exception of New Mexico, Gore states are contiguous either to Canada or to other Gore states. In the most peaceful and democratic way, without invoking images of Jefferson Davis and Robert E. Lee, these states need to secede from the Union, reform into provinces and join Canada.Uh, if Lincoln had let the South secede, then that would have been peaceful too. But I digress. I'll let the professor tell you the benefits of a Canadian citizenship: Citizens of the new Canadian provinces would enjoy basic entitlements and benefits unheard of in the U.S., including: universal health care;Who wouldn't want to wait 80 weeks for tonsils to be taken out? good and affordable colleges and universities;I'm glad I chose Boston University over Boston College; apparently BC isn't a good and affordable college. good mass transit in major cities;BC:not a good and affordable college, but pays professor Lewis enough so that he never has to ride the excellent Boston subway system. lower rates of violent crime and pollution;We all know about those street toughs and smog factories at Chapel Hill. affordable prescription drugs;All those times that the professor must have heard about the free-rider problem of supporting progressive causes, he never thought to apply it to drug research. and enhanced respect for the civil rights of all people, including gays and lesbians.I guess he's ignoring the majority in the Canadian legislature that opposes gay marriage. There are many more benefits of becoming Canadian, according to Lewis, but I have to pack and get ready to move to a red-state so I can remain in the country. (Via Instapundit) |
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